Monday, November 11, 2019

Different – With Purpose


My wife and I are nothing alike. She notices things I never do. She is a detail person. She is a bright shiny light of goodness.

I am analytical and can sometimes be messy. I am a detail person when it comes to any project I am working on, but that might mean I can lose sight of other things for a time. I tend to be an introvert.

I used to think an introverted person was someone who didn't like people and didn't like to talk. Introverts were shy people, right? My view was challenged in a few recent articles I've read. Introverts are less willing to engage in small talk. If they talk they want it to mean something. They might be engaged in very public work, but when it's all done they need some alone time to recharge. They can be the life of the party, but they don't automatically seek it.

Introverts tend to be creative and can be easily misunderstood. Some may think an introvert is snobby because they can be quiet or because they may seek a place to get away from it all. Introverts aren't necessarily interested in impressing other people, but they are interested in creating things that can impact other people.

My wife used to be very shy, but I don't think she was an introvert. Today it is so easy for her to start a conversation and keep it going. People like being around her. She makes others laugh and feel comfortable. She makes me very proud to be her husband.


It would be easy for me to simply hide away after my work is done for the day, but Nancy has been God's perfect gift. Over the years she continues to encourage me to live outside my comfort zone. We've been good for each other. Neither of us are the same people we were when we met more than 30 years ago – and that's OK. I think both of us are more like the people God intended us to be. Imperfect to be sure, but God has been consistent in shaping us as we cooperate with His plan.

In some ways we are very much alike. We are very interested in how we raise our kids. We want to be very intentional about following God. We want to make the choice to love each other even when we disagree.

Nancy is my best friend. My best conversations are with her. My happiest moments are just being with her. We have a couple of days a week when we go out for a cup of hot cocoa or a meal. These are some of our favorite moments of the week.

All of us bring good things and bad into a marriage. We may want to be as compatible with the other person as we can, but in the end God can reshape two very different people into a couple that can't imagine living life without each other.

...a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” Genesis 2:24 (NIV)

I think God makes us different with great purpose. If we were all alike we would be incredibly bored. There would be no mystery, no need to learn, no curiosity. When we learn how we are different we can learn how those differences can compliment the relationship. This works not only in marriage, but in friendships as well.

No matter how different you may feel God has a place where only you fit.

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